


Sparks Fly

by k_itsmay



Category: the GazettE
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Crushes, Drama, Eventual Romance, Friendship, M/M, Male Friendship, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Romance, Slice of Life, Swearing, Teenage Drama, Use of Real Names, a little bit, yeah sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2017-04-01
Packaged: 2018-07-22 03:13:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7417369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/k_itsmay/pseuds/k_itsmay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>To Akira, Takayuki was that song he never expected to fall in love with because it was different from the others he liked. But one at first seemingly insignificant encounter and suddenly he couldn’t get enough.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

“Hey, Koyou, you know Matsumoto?”

“Yes, Akira, yes I do know him. You talk about him all the time. Like yesterday you told me that he plays drums and how cool that is; literally _all_ the time. Do you have a crush on him or something?”

“What?”

“Nothing. Keep going.”

“Uh, okay? Anyway, he told me a story about how he and his friends used to make sand dumplings when they were little. I did that too! Isn’t that funny?!”

“I wonder if he tried eating them for real, like you told me you did.”

“It tasted really gross. Please don’t tell him I did that,” Akira shuddered.

“Why would I?” Koyou asked as they stepped into the music shop.

As soon as the doors closed, Koyou began to stalk through the aisles of tapes, “I hope it’s here,” he mumbled, “if it’s not then my sister’s gonna kill me for another year of no birthday presents…” He disappeared into the shop and Akira was left wandering around the section full of new music.

He stood in one spot and looked all around him. To his left was a name he recognised. _Oh,_ he thought while walking towards the stand, _that’s the singer my sister was talking about the other day_. He slipped the headphones on and pressed play.

The first sound to fill his ears was the soft strumming of an acoustic guitar, followed by an equally soft singing voice. Akira raised an eyebrow while reading the small note on the table that praised the record as a refreshing masterpiece of simple love ballads. _Doesn’t really sound like a masterpiece,_ he thought. But something in his heart begged to differ. The voice was so sweetly warm and gentle like a parent singing a lullaby, and the lyrics were simple yet at the same time it resonated with something within him. It wasn’t anything like the empowering rock and roll he was used to, nor the catchy dance beats he would ‘accidentally’ become addicted to for a short while at a time. The simple bass drum slowed his heart down until they matched, and Akira felt a strange wave of nostalgia, but a feeling of longing pulling at his heart. A small thought went through his head, _actually,_ it said, _I kinda like this._

“Hey, Suzuki, is that you?”

Akira ripped the headphones off his head before seeing Takayuki Matsumoto standing right next to him. He quickly hid the headphones behind his back. “H-hey.”

“What are you listening to?”

He began to panic – there was no way anyone was seeing him listening to music other than punk rock, and especially not cheesy love songs! “Uh, nothing—“

Matsumoto leaned to the side to take a peek at the name card sitting on the stand, “Oh, I’ve heard of them. Is it good?”

Akira wanted to sigh with relief _so bad_ , “It’s…not really my thing. I was just curious about it because my sister was talking about it, you know?” He had said that, but something inside him wanted to take it back and admit that he liked it.

“Oh, cool. I’ve never heard any of their music. So anyway,” he held up a small cassette box with a large X printed on the front, “I’ll see you at school tomorrow.” He spun around on his heel and walked towards the register.

Suddenly he felt something hard bonk the top of his head. Akira turned to Koyou standing next to him. “I found it, let’s go.” Without waiting for a response, he headed for the register just as Matsumoto left the shop.

_Wow, he likes X too?_ Just before they left, Akira turned around and stared at the cassette box sitting on the stand. For a split second he thought, _fuck it,_ and grabbed the tape while reaching for his wallet out of his bag.

* * *

“’You laugh with me in a memory of what feels like yesterday, but now I’m alone watching you from worlds away,’” Akira hummed to himself absentmindedly at the table with Koyou sitting across from him.

“Hey, Akira, what song is that? I’ve never heard you sing that before,” Koyou commented.

“Hm?” he looked up from his study notes, “It’s from that tape I bought the other day. Matsumoto was there, do you remember?”

“I think I saw him, yeah.”

Akira played the song over and over in his head, still humming the melody as he studied. While he was absentmindedly reading through the rules of handling heavy machinery, an image of a rooftop and two people sitting side by side suddenly flashed through his head. Akira widened his eyes.

Koyou raised his eyebrow. “Are…you okay?”

“Hold up,” Akira rested his head in his hand. What was that just now? He brought back the memory of the image. He was sitting on the rooftop sharing earphones with another boy. He imagined it was Koyou next to him at first, but he shook his head, no, it definitely wasn’t Koyou…Who else would I share earphones with? He replaced it with another boy, a shorter one, and suddenly everything felt pieced together.

“K-Koyou…”

“What’s up?”

“I…I think…” he stammered, “I like…Ma…Matsumoto…?”

The other boy paused and stared blankly at his best friend flustering. “Akira.”

“…Yeah?”

“Did you _just_ realise?”


	2. Chapter 1

A term into the school year and Akira was already done. Not officially, but he was sick of it. He didn’t care about whether certain sets were groups, or embryonic development, or whether or not a chimpanzee should’ve been considered a legal US citizen because it was confined in a cage and was ‘in need of basic human rights’. He did not give a _shit_ about those things.

He just wanted to play bass, _dammit!_ He kicked the rock in front of him and watched it skid in front of him as he dragged his feet on the path to school. Throwing his head back to curse at the sky he sighed, “This sucks.”

“There it is, Akira’s daily confirmation that school, does in fact, suck.” Koyou turned his palms up and gave a shrugging gesture. He stuck his hands back into his pockets and looked at Akira walking with his head down. “Hey, I heard that a certain someone is still looking for band members. Didn’t you see him yesterday still striking up conversations with all the guys who can play instruments?”  
  
Koyou gave Akira a wink, but the latter simply frowned and turned away. “He’s been trying too hard, why won’t he just give up already?”

“I think what you mean to say is,” Koyou smirked, “’Damn! Why hasn’t he asked me to be in his band yet?! I’m the best bassist in the whole school!’”

Akira’s cheeks flared up. He spun around and kicked Koyou’s leg, but the joker simply stumbled to the side and then back next to his best friend. “I…I was not…” Akira mumbled.

“Fine, fine, but I think you’re the best bassist in our school. I mean, you look cool when you play, and I know you love bass a lot. Why don’t you ask him yourself?”

“Thanks, but there’s no way he’d say yes. We’ve barely ever talked.” He sighed as they entered the school gates.

“Why don’t you try to get on his good side then?” Koyou said while holding in a laugh. He _knew_ Akira was going to punch him for what he was thinking of saying next. “Like, I don’t know; take him out somewhere nice and special.”

“T-t-take…Matsumoto…out…?” His face was flushing redder by the seconds. “Like, what, on a date?” He started laughing nervously, “What are you on about? I wouldn’t take him on a date!”

 _I didn’t even say on a date, dummy,_ Koyou thought. But he was expecting it. Akira was quick to jump to conclusions, after all, especially when he was flustered. “Well, I’ve talked to Matsumoto a couple of times and he doesn’t seem like the kind of guy you’d take to a strip club to get something going. I think dinner would be nicer.”

“That’s the classic setup for getting a new band member, isn’t it? But that would be me recruiting him, not the other way around.”

“Better than nothing right?”

Inside the school entrance towards the far left side of the locker room was a boy gently opening his shoe locker. He was shorter than both Koyou and Akira with small, slightly slumped shoulders and straight black hair at a socially acceptable length, and didn’t seem like a big deal at all. Koyou gently elbowed Akira’s side before he could walk off, “Hey, speak of the devil.”

Akira started grumbling, “Freaking hell Kouyou, why do you feel the need to point him out to me?”

But the taller boy just laughed to himself, “I thought that maybe you’d like to see his out-of-this-world-ness at every given opportunity, you know.”

“Whatever.” Akira opened his locker and dropped his shoes on the floor before swapping them. “But he’ll probably find a bassist without even asking me. I bet he’s already asked Sakamoto, or even Chigusa.”

Koyou raised an eyebrow, “You’re joking, right? They’ve got bands of their own already! Everybody knows that, even someone who’s out of the loop like Matsumoto!” He slapped Akira’s back, “Be a little more positive! It’s not like he doesn’t know you exist. I think he’ll ask you.”

Rolling his eyes, Akira turned around and started heading to class, “If he asks me within the next week, I’ll buy you an ice cream.”

“Don’t you forget that deal when I win!” Koyou relaxed into a smile before catching up with Akira, swinging an arm around his shoulder as they headed off to class.


	3. Chapter 2

Akira was resting his cheek on his hand, barely keeping his eyes open to his teacher’s droning. Koyou’s suggestion made him wonder, why did he like Matsumoto anyway? He hadn’t liked him for a long time, so he wasn’t really aware of what exactly it was about Matsumoto that drew him.

He glanced towards the desk a few rows in front and one to his right. There he was. _Huh, perfect view._ Akira began to stare. He knew Matsumoto wasn’t athletic in the slightest, so it wasn’t like he had a really nice physique – not that he really cared, the small lankiness about him was cute. And his voice was quite deep for someone his size, but at times it could be playful as well. And he liked a lot of different things, so it wasn’t that hard to strike small talk with him. And he was so cute when the pitch of his voice rose when he became enthusiastic about something! And, and—

With a blush suddenly rising on his face, he internally slapped himself. _No no no no, don’t start that! Think! When did I realise I like him?!_ Koyou had figured out that he liked Matsumoto before Akira did himself – really said something about how much he knew about his own crush. He rolled his eyes. Akira and Matsumoto had talked a little every now and then throughout the term that school started because they both liked the Sex Pistols. They both wanted to play music, they both liked action movies, and…manga? The genres they preferred were different, but it was a start.

They were destined for sure.

Akira sighed.

“Suzuki, can you please read the next page?”

He looked up at the teacher in wide-eyed shock. _Shit! I wasn’t paying attention! Where are we?!_ He hastily stood up in his chair with the novel in his hand. “Uh…” His heart raced in his chest as his eyes flicked around the page in panic. “U-okay, um, ’The men rushed forward a—‘”

“You’re about two pages behind, but good try,” the teacher raised an eyebrow with amusement, “Try to pay attention next time.”

The class giggled as Akira dropped back into his seat with a grumpy red face. He immediately glanced at Matsumoto, but he was just staring at his book with no reaction to what had just happened. _At least notice my existence,_ he thought.

* * *

The bell rung throughout the school and all the students began to stand up and pack their books away. Akira tossed his things into his locker before shoving his hands into his pockets and leaving the classroom. He mumbled, “Just because I lost the spot in the book doesn’t mean I can’t go to the bathroom…”

Outside of the next classroom, he saw Koyou standing outside the door. Just before Akira called out to him, he saw a shorter boy with his head down saying something to him. _Matsumoto?!_ Then Koyou nodded and the two of them started to go somewhere else.

 _Okay, okay, what the fuck?_ Akira squinted. _Hold up, is Matsumoto confessing to Koyou?! Does he not know that Koyou has like zero interest in dating right now?! Literally everyone knows he’s the most romantically uninterested person in this entire school!_ He quietly weaved between the circles of students, keeping his eye on Matsumoto and Koyou walking together from a safe distance behind them. The amount of people around began to diminish until Matsumoto and Koyou finally stopped at the stairwell.

Akira took a step back and hid. _I know Koyou probably wouldn’t do this, but what if he started dating Matsumoto? At least that would mean I could finally get over him, because I don’t even know why and when I started liking him in the first place._

“Hey, so, Takashima…” Matsumoto coughed. He stood in front of him in silent nervousness for a few seconds before taking a deep breath. “Okay, I probably sound crazy and it’s totally okay if you say no, but—“

_Oh my god he is so asking him out. Can you hear how rushed he’s saying this?!_

“You’ve probably seen me do this a lot, and please don’t think that you’re just a next choice. Anyway, there’s only me, a vocalist and another guitarist right now, and it’d be great if we had two. So,” he balled his fists and bowed his head, “Please join our band!”

_Oh so that’s what this was about. Hey, what about me?! I’ll be your bassist!_

“Oh, I thought you were confessing to me or something because you were so formal about this, bringing me to a stairwell and everything,” Koyou laughed.

Matsumoto peeked upwards, “So, what’s your answer?”

“Yeah, ‘kay, I’ll join.” He began to walk back towards the stairs.

Akira heard their footsteps approaching. _Shit!_ He quickly crawled up the stairs before running back into the hallway.

Koyou suddenly stopped mid-step. “But…I do have one condition.”

Matsumoto straightened. “And what would that be?”

“Akira Suzuki is the bassist. You’re probably thinking that I’m saying this just because he’s my best friend, but trust me, he’s plenty good. Oh, and you have to ask him yourself. Speaking of him, he’s probably waiting for me so I’m gonna head back.”

Matsumoto gulped and looked away towards the wall, “I…I don’t know if I can do that…”

“Hm?” Koyou turned around, “Any particular reason why?”

“Because…I don’t know, he…” Matsumoto’s lips quivered. “Never mind, forget what I just said.” He turned around and started walking back up the stairs alone.

Koyou smirked.


	4. Chapter 3

Akira tried to shove the jealousy of Matsumoto asking Koyou to join his band but not him out of his mind for the rest of the school day. But Koyou was just strolling along next to him as though nothing had happened! At the same time, what was he so mad about anyway? If Matsumoto had noticed Koyou’s skills, then he must’ve seen Akira play at least once. Maybe he was thinking of asking Akira too, but he just couldn’t find him. He couldn’t be so impatient! It had only been a few hours! No matter what he thought the nagging envy still clawed at his heart, and his logic. His internal battle left him restless, frustrated even. But he had to hide it, lashing out at Koyou or anyone else was the last thing he wanted.

The school bell rang throughout the halls as the last period ended. Akira snatched his bag from his locker, stuffed his books inside and stormed out without even so much as a glance towards Koyou’s classroom as he passed.

Just as Akira turned after leaving the school gate, he felt a hand grab his shoulder and spin him around. “Koyou?”

“Don’t ‘Koyou?’ me!” he shouted. “What’s up with you today?! Why did you ditch me?!”

“It’s…nothing. Nothing happened.” Akira shrugged and forced a small laugh, “My bad, I was probably thinking about something when I passed your classroom and didn’t wait for you.” Then he looked down at the ground, “I’m sorry, I know you hate it when you get ignored…”

Koyou pressed his lips into a thin line and clenched his fists. _Calm down, Koyou._ He sighed heavily, “I overreacted, I’m sorry.” He closed his eyes and took a slow, deep breath. “I think that’s enough negativity for today. Wanna get something to eat?”

Chill out, was basically what Koyou was trying to say. While they wandered around the shops looking for something to eat, Akira glanced back and forth between the ground and Koyou with guilt. _Snap out of it already! You’re making it worse!_ He shook his head and looked in front of him.

Eventually the two of them sat down at a diner.

As they waited for their food, Akira confessed, “I…saw you at recess…talking to Matsumoto…”

Koyou’s eyes widened and his face paled, _Oh shit! Did he hear me make the deal?!_

“You know,” he laughed under his breath, “I was thinking weird things like ‘why didn’t he ask me? Does he hate me?’ and shit like that. After that I felt down, and then I walked right past you without even looking at you.” He leaned his forehead against his hand, “I’m such an idiot, I’m sorry. If you wanna punch me, go ahead.”

Seeing Akira drowning in guilt pained his best friend. It didn’t seem like he knew about Koyou and Matsumoto’s deal either. Koyou looked at him worriedly, “You think I’d do something like that over something like this?” He folded his arms and scoffed, “If you honestly think I’m that kind of person I’d really punch you!” When Akira looked up at him in the eye he smiled, “I know you’re a bit of an idiot, but not like this.” Koyou suddenly stood up and pinched Akira’s nose. Hard.

“Ow ow ow! Stop that!”

“See? You don’t actually want me to punch you,” Koyou said as he sat back down. “Don’t say things like that when you don’t mean them. And besides, I overreacted too, I should’ve thought that there was something that was making you upset instead of just thinking about myself. So, we good?”

Akira leaned his arm over the table and pinched Koyou’s nose. “Now we are!” he said as Koyou struggled in pain.

“You did it way harder than I did!” Koyou whined. “Ugh, anyway I’m buying a drink. Be right back.” He stood up and stormed towards the counter grumpily.

“Here you go! One omelet rice and one curry rice!”

“Thank you!” Akira picked up the spoon sitting next to him and began to dig into the curry rice. He heard someone sit down on the sofa across him. “Dude, this curry rice is freaking amazing—!” he looked up and saw Matsumoto sitting across from him. He froze.

The shorter boy tilted his head, “May I sit?”

“Y-you’ve already sat down so…why did you bother asking?” Akira quickly looked away as his face reddened with embarrassment.

He chuckled, “Sorry. But can I talk to you about something?” his voice suddenly softened.

“Sure?”

Matsumoto suddenly looked awfully nervous for the person who just sat across an acquaintance without warning. He took a deep breath, set his hands firmly on his legs and bowed his head, “Please join my band.”

The question had come completely out of the blue. Akira only just threw out his jealousy towards Koyou but there Matsumoto was with his head fucking _bowed_ to him, asking so kindly to join his band yet Akira was sitting on the booth dumbstruck like he never considered that possibility. Realising he had probably been silent for a long time, he starts, “Y-yeah, okay, I’ll…join your band. Just put your head up!”

He did so and met Akira with light dancing in his eyes and a beaming smile.  
 _Oh my shit he is so cute._ Akira half-smiled, trying to hide his extreme giddiness at that moment, “You don’t have to bow your head to me, you know? So uh, when’s practice?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?”

“Yep, tomorrow after school at the studio across the ramen place at the corner of the street a few minutes from our school. I’ve told Takashima the details too.” Smiling, Matsumoto stood up from the seat and walked out of the booth, “See you tomorrow!”

Akira watched Matsumoto leave the diner with curry rice slipping off his spoon, mouth gaped open like he saw an angel.

Koyou leaned on the side of Akira’s booth. “Tomorrow~ Tomorrow~ I love you~ Tomorrow~” he sung. He snorted when Akira looked at him with a raised eyebrow and crooked mouth. “You owe me ice cream.”


	5. Chapter 4

“Man, it’s been a while since I’ve come to a studio.” Akira gazed at the small building with his hand blocking the sun out of his eyes.

Koyou stepped towards the building and peered at it, “Yeah, ever since our last one broke apart and you started working on that heavy equipment license test we haven’t been anywhere near here. How’s that going by the way?”

“It’s in a few weeks but I think I’ve pretty much nailed everything.”

“Nice.”

The duo went down the stairs until they reached a small reception, followed by a narrow corridor lined with sound proof doors. As Kouyou walked up to the desk, Akira stood behind him and stared at the whiteboard on the wall filled with messily written time frames, band names and prices.

Suddenly, Kouyou tapped Akira’s shoulder. “They’re in Studio 5. Come on.”

The duo passed by all the doors and looked around them as blurred sound slipped through the mediocre sound proofing. “Hey, we’re pretty much going in blind, aren’t we?” Akira asked. “We don’t even know how good they are. They might be completely out of our league!”

Kouyou shrugged. “Well, then there’s a possibility the reverse is true as well - we might be better than them. I’d be a little more worried if that were the case, honestly.” They reached the end of the hallway and stood in front of a door in the middle. “This is the one.” Kouyou took a deep breath and held the metal door knob gently in his hand. Pressing his lips together, he opened the door.

As soon as they stepped in, distorted guitar and pounding drums burst into their ears. Inside was Matsumoto, a guitarist and vocalist jamming like they were on stage performing for a screaming crowd. Both Akira and Kouyou were taken aback. The guitarist was almost tiny in comparison to Kouyou, but the energy he poured into his playing was astounding, and despite being the only guitarist there he made the music sound full, even without a lead nor a bass line. Then there was the vocalist, who was probably around Akira’s height, had a coarse voice that suited the intensity of the music perfectly and the passion in his voice was aligned with the guitarist’s energy. And finally, Matsumoto’s drumming provided the beat, particularly heavy on the offbeats and made the music sound even faster and more energetic than what it would seem transcribed.

Akira and Kouyou looked at each other, completely entranced but confident. All their fears had been wiped away just by listening to them for a few seconds.

Suddenly the music stopped and Matsumoto stood up from his stool, “Takashima! Suzuki!” He maneuvered around the drums and microphones and jogged towards the door. “Thanks for coming, you two!” He turned around to face the vocalist and guitarist and patted Akira and Kouyou on their backs, “This is Takashima and Suzuki, I asked them to be our new guitarist and bassist.” Matsumoto then turned around again, “Guys, this is Yamada and Gondo, the guitarist and vocalist. Yamada and Gondo, Takashima and Suzuki.”

Akira stammered, “N-nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too,” Gondo gave a bright smile. “Why don’t you guys come inside? All the air-conditioning’s gonna escape if you keep standing in the doorway like that.”

Feeling welcomed by Gondo and Matsumoto, Akira and Kouyou quickly entered the studio and set themselves up before they started jamming again. The two of them were able to slip in quickly with the band’s music and spice it up in their own ways - Kouyou tended to add some melody to the guitar parts and they worked well against the vocals, while Akira asked Yamada for the chords he was using and could do a little improvising as well as thicken the harmonies. Though, they both did notice that Yamada wasn’t playing with nearly as much energy as he was when they first walked in. But if there was one thing that Akira enjoyed, it was paying attention to Matsumoto’s rhythms and being the most in-sync with him - well, second to Yamada, but he thought that he felt a strong connection with Matsumoto as they jammed. After all, they were the band’s bass and drum section. They had to hit it off well, right? He was just hoping Matsumoto felt the same.

By the time the five of them left the studio, the town was fogged and misty with pouring rain. They could hear the heavy pattering against the concrete and the swishing of water as it streamed down the drains. Yamada said a few words to Gondo, followed by a quick goodbye to him before opening his umbrella and leaving the group.

 _Ah, crap,_ Akira thought. “I knew I should’ve brought an umbrella…”

“Same here,” Matsumoto sighed. “I was so excited about today that I completely forgot.”

 _Eh? Excited? Excited about what?_ Akira glanced at Matsumoto. _He doesn’t mean about me and Kouyou joining the band right?_ Just the thought that maybe that was the case made his heart race, but also lifted his shoulders with a small sense of pride.

Kouyou nonchalantly pulled out a small umbrella out of a plastic bag and opened it. “Akira, you coming?”

“Huh? Just Suzuki?” Gondo pointed at himself. “What about us!?” he joked. He felt like a rock was thrown at him as Kouyou stared at him blankly. “I-I was just kidding…”

Kouyou looked at Akira again and raised an eyebrow, non-verbally repeating his question.

“Oh, uh, sorry Kouyou, Mum told me to go buy some stuff from the supermarket on the way home.”

“Do you want me to come with you–”

“It’s cool! I’ll just run there and quickly buy a cheap umbrella!” As he was trying to convince Kouyou to go on without him, Akira continued to ‘subtly’ wink at him. “And besides, your umbrella’s small and I don’t want you getting wet,” he winked again, “so, yeah. Don’t worry about me!” Another wink.

Kouyou stared at him for another few seconds before sighing. “Okay, but don’t come complaining to me about getting drenched and smelling gross later.” Just as he turned to walk away, he quickly shot his own wink at Akira.

“Ah, wait, Takashima! Can I share your umbrella with you since Suzuki isn’t?! It’s okay if you say no!”

He hesitated at first, but then shrugged. “Yeah, sure.”

Kouyou began to walk into the rain while Gondo caught up to him. After a few seconds, Kouyou spoke. “Can I ask a question?” He saw Gondo turn his attention to him. “How come as soon as me and Akira started jamming with you did Yamada suddenly stop playing so energetically? And why hasn’t he come to talk to me about who’s doing lead and who’s doing rhythm?”

Gondo giggled, “He’s just shy - not really the type that can be all buddy-buddy with strangers, you know? But Yamada actually just asked me to talk to you about it. He said you can take turns with the roles and maybe even try twinning.” He shoved his hands into his pockets. “I’ll tell you though, if you talk to him and ask him stuff directly, he’ll tell you everything you need to know. He’s a smart kid, knows what people want, but he’s just a little timid, especially since you’re tall.”

Akira and Matsumoto watched Kouyou and Gondo’s silhouettes fade into the rain. It was silent. At least, on the outside it was. Akira’s heart was racing and his panicking thoughts were as loud as a motorbike being revved up to obnoxious levels. He shuffled in his shoes. “So, pretty heavy rain huh?” he coughed. “Do you live far away?” His insides screamed, _what was that?! What the hell was that?!_

“Yeah, I do,” Matsumoto nodded.

Then it was silent again.

 _Great job, Akira - that question was a wonderful conversation starter._ Oh shut up, can you do any better? _I am you._ Right. Akira’s head suddenly lifted, and he excitedly turned his head towards Matsumoto. _Hold up! Too fast! Keep your cool!_ He quietly took a deep breath, “Hey, Matsumoto, is it okay if…” his voice caught in his throat, “I, uh.”

Matsumoto tilted his head to the side.

 _Oh god he’s cute._ Hey! You’re in the middle of the sentence just out with it already! He stammered, “CanIcallyouMatsu?”

He blinked. “M-Matsu?”

Was it just his imagination? Or was his crush’s face actually turning red? He continued anyway, “Yeah, I was thinking that Matsumoto’s kinda long, and well it’s just easier saying Matsu.” Akira began to fluster at Matsumoto staring at him so blankly, “I-I did the same thing with Kouyou the first time we met too! Since Takashima is kind of a mouthful…” _Oh my god, was that too soon? Does he think I’m coming on to him?! I’ve fucked up oh my g–_

“If you want…” Matsumoto coughed and stared at the ground, “You can just call me Taka…”

 _Hold up. Hold up. Is he coming on to_ me _now?_ “Uh, yeah, okay, if that’s fine with you,” Akira nodded hastily and smiled nervously.

Taka looked towards the diminishing rain like he had seen a ghost. “Sorry, Suzuki, gotta run!” Without another word from him nor Akira he ran into the rain and disappeared into the crowd of umbrellas crossing the street, leaving Akira in the shade with his hand reaching towards nothing. Staring into the distance he lowered his arm.

_So, like, what are we?_


	6. Chapter 5

Kouyou sat on top of the desk with his feet on the chair, facing Akira and reading the paper with his mouth resting on his fist. He flipped the page over and skimmed through the written points again, before flipping back. “Looks pretty good. Didn’t know Matsumoto was into writing songs, did you?”

“I was surprised too!” Akira dropped a small piece of fried chicken into his mouth. “He can draw as well. Man, Taka’s pretty talented…”

“Hey, don’t eat with your mouth full. And yeah I guess–” Kouyou stopped, then looked at Akira above the sheet of paper, “Wait a second, ‘Taka’?”

“Yeah?”

“You call Matsumoto by his first name but we don’t. When did this happen?!”

Akira swallowed his food slowly and then blushed, “Just yesterday, after rehearsal.”

Kouyou gave a sly eye and a cock of the eyebrow. “Oh, okay,” he kicked the chair in front of him and jumped down, landing on the seat before resting his arms on the back of it. “I didn’t hear about this?”

“Y-yeah, well, um,” Akira’s skin turned a deep scarlet, “I thought it wasn’t important…”

He snorted, “Not important? You think something that makes you blush this hard just by thinking about it is not important?” Kouyou leaned back and folded his arms, “You think he likes you~ Akira, you’re so cute.”

“Shut up!” Akira kicked back and crossed his legs with his boxed lunch still in his hands. “At least let me dream that he likes me.”

“Chill, I didn’t say he doesn’t.” With a push Kouyou dived forward into the back of the chair and swung a piece of fried chicken from Akira’s lunchbox. “He let’s you call him by his first name. You’re either on the highest level of best friends or he likes you. I think it’s the second, since you kind of never talked to each other until two days ago.” He smiled and cheekily ate the piece of chicken.

Akira raised his eyebrow, “Everyone knows we’re inseparable, even a guy who’s out of the loop like Taka.”

“ _Who’s_ out of the loop now?”

Both of the boys jump and turn slowly to see Taka dragging an empty chair over and sitting down at Akira’s desk. Akira choked, “I didn’t mean it that way!”

“Oh, _really?_ ” Taka slammed his hand on Akira’s desk and leaned in until he was an inch away from his face. “I’m sorry, who’s the one who hasn’t been in any bands for the past two years? I guess that means someone who’s out of the loop like me wouldn’t have any idea about you two whatsoever, but I did! And what does that mean?!”

Eyes widened and arms flopped back into the window, Akira turned towards Kouyou with cold sweat running down his neck. _KOUYOU, HELP ME._

But Kouyou was just trembling with bottled up laughter with his hand over his mouth and another piece of Akira’s chicken in the other. _You got yourself into this._

Eventually Taka rested back into his chair and sighed, “I was just kidding.”

Akira shot a confused look at Kouyou before lowering his arms. Suddenly his face began to redden again, and he began to glance back and forth between Kouyou and his food. _Holy shit, he was so close._

Kouyou pulled a one-sided grin and raised his eyebrows.

Taka narrowed his eyes, “Why aren’t you guys saying anything?”

They froze.

Silently, a girl walked towards Kouyou and gently tapped him on the shoulder. “Um, Takashima, it was our turn to take the handouts to the teacher’s office…”

He turned around, “Oh shit, sorry, I’ll come now.” He stood up, gently took half of the papers from the girl’s arms and began to walk away. Just in front of the classroom door, he spun around and gave Akira a ‘subtle’ wink.

Akira’s eye twitched.

“So, have you heard X’s new song?” Taka asked.

“Eh-, you mean the one you bought the other day or something? I haven’t listened to it yet. I spent my money on another CD,” he coughed and then nervously laughed to himself.

“Really? You can borrow mine if you want and you can copy it to another tape or something,” he said, “I can bring it tomorrow.” Akira politely nodded and accepted, and then Taka’s face brightened, “Hey, did you go to their concert a few months ago?”

Akira straightened in his seat, “It was awesome! Even though Kouyou and I didn’t get the VIP tickets in time and ended up on the second floor it was cool seeing them from above! It was kind of hard to headbang though, I was afraid I’d fall off the balcony or something,” he laughed.

“Same here, at LUNA SEA’s show last year! But I did it anyway and it was fun.”

“Woah, you went to LUNA SEA as well?!”

Kouyou followed his classmate back to their classroom. “Sorry, you had to come looking for me to remind me again. I promise I won’t forget next time,” he scratched the back of his head.

The girl giggled as she reached the classroom door, “That’s okay, I’m kind of used to it now, and I always find you in the classroom next door anyway.” She then entered the classroom and went back to her friends sitting in the front corner.

Kouyou smiled and walked towards Akira’s classroom, but then stopped with his hand on the door as he entered it. At the other side of the classroom was Akira and Taka sitting at the desk excitedly talking, leaner closer and closer towards each other before suddenly jumping back and cheering about another common interest they found. Slowly, Kouyou began to step back. _Things are getting good for him, I shouldn’t interrupt._ He had thought that, but there was still a heaviness in his chest that he couldn’t help but despise. _I’ll…go find Gondo…_ He turned around and left the classroom.

“Hey, Duck Lips! Where’s the monkey?!”

Kouyou snapped his gaze towards a group of large boys standing at the window across the hallway surrounded by a small group of girls. He glared at them coldly before walking away.

* * *

“Kouyou, where did you go? You went to take the handouts to the teachers’ office but you never came back.” Akira, Kouyou and Taka walked alongside each other out of the school gates and towards the path leading to the city.

Kouyou coughed, “I…I realised I had maths after lunch and I forgot to do my homework so I kind of panicked.” He let out a small chuckle, “Sorry I didn’t come back.”

“Oh, okay,”  Akira looked forward towards the crossing, “Did you manage to do it?”

“Yeah, kinda.”

The rest of the walk to the studio was silent.

* * *

That routine went on for weeks.

Every now and then Taka would go to Akira’s classroom to sit with him and Kouyou at lunch, but every single time he showed up he and Akira would just…go, like a bullet train. And they wouldn’t stop, and there was rarely ever a single space where Kouyou could say something. He knew it wasn’t Taka’s fault, he couldn’t get mad at him for liking to talk to Akira and because Taka and himself weren’t the best of friends, and it would’ve been selfish to not allow them to talk to each other freely just because he sometimes felt left out.

But eventually, on the bad days when the weight in his chest squeezed his heart and throat, he would make an excuse to stand up from the rattling chair and walk away. _I need to go to the bathroom. I forgot to do my homework again. I need to give back the handouts._ Then after a while, he sometimes didn’t even go with them to the studio anymore.

And the worst part was, Akira didn’t question any of it.

* * *

“Matsumoto and Suzuki huh…” Gondo lay on the rooftop of the school next to Kouyou sitting up and hugging his legs. “They’re pretty good together, don’t you think? Can’t even get a word in when those two are around each other.”

“That’s the problem!” Kouyou blurted, and immediately he shut his lips tight as he voice echoed in the wind. He looked to his left to see Gondo staring at him blankly. “It’s just…I thought, since Akira likes Matsumoto a lot it would make him happy to be around him. And he is happy, and that makes me happy, but…” he lowered his voice, “It’s like he’s forgotten about me. And I feel bad for feeling that way, like, I don’t have any right to. And if I say something it would be unfair.”

Gondo looked back up to the cloudy sky. “I don’t think he’s forgotten about you.” He stretched his arm out and looked between his fingers. “Neither of you have said anything, right? So you won’t really know for sure. And besides, Suzuki’s a good guy, and you’re his best friend. There’s no way he’d forget about you. Maybe he’s just…a little hung up with hanging out with Matsumoto. But even so, when you’re not around, there’s no way he isn’t wishing you’re there.

“But anyway, don’t feel bad about how you feel. It hurts to feel like you’ve been replaced. But just because he doesn’t talk to you all the time doesn’t mean you’re not best friends anymore. And you know, you don’t have to leave them alone every time Matsumoto comes along.” Gondo sat up and pat his hand on Kouyou’s back, “It’ll be okay.”

Kouyou sure hoped so.

* * *

Akira buried his face in his arms on top of his desk, staring at the messily written notes on the page that continued to blur the longer he stared. The exam was in two days, but Akira didn’t see any point in going over the notes he had already been studying for weeks. So he closed the book without reading it, for the fifth day in a row.

His phone suddenly buzzed next to him, and he quickly picked it up.

_Hey, Suzuki, wanna go somewhere tomorrow? Just the two of us._


	7. Chapter 6

Akira stood at the front of the shopping centre and watched the light raindrops fall onto the concrete. Staring down at the glow of raindrops bouncing off the pavement, he fiddled aimlessly with his umbrella.

He didn’t feel good that day, he knew that much.

First, Kouyou had been acting weird whenever Taka was around, which was…most of the time. Before he had just shrugged it off and joined their conversations anyway, but after a while he would suddenly leave as soon as Taka came in. _Did Kouyou and Taka get into a fight? Is Kouyou actually acting weird, or am I the one being weird? Should I talk to him about it? What if it’s actually nothing and I’m just overreacting?_ The vortex of conflicting questions twisted in his gut. He held his index finger between his thumb and the fingers of his other hand, squeezing.

Although Taka had basically asked him out on a date, he hadn’t told Kouyou anything…again. Of course, Akira was excited, almost too excited, and caught himself having a sleepless night tossing and turning about whether Taka saw it as a simple outing or a date, and whether or not it was right for Akira to be reacting that way.

Honestly, it didn’t help his confusion. And for the worst part, he was terrified that if he told Kouyou–

“Suzuki!”

Akira’s thoughts ceased. He heard footsteps splashing the puddles, and when he looked up he saw Taka running through the rain without an umbrella. “Taka! What are you doing?! Didn’t you bring an umbrella?!”

Taka ran into the shade next to Akira and caught his breath. “I–” he wheezes, “Both of my parents went out, there wasn’t an umbrella for me.” He looked out towards the rain, “I forget how crazy it gets every year…”

“The hell?” Akira chuckled. “Well, I guess it can’t get much worse than it is right now. Anyway, let’s go.”

His previous train of thought never returned.

* * *

Taka wrapped his small fingers around the paper shopping bag and walked out of the shop with Akira practically chasing behind him. He muttered, “Sport bag…sport bag…” Suddenly he felt a hand grab his shoulder and yank him backwards, almost making him drop everything.

“Dude, why are you rushing so much?! I said ‘wait up’ like five times!” Akira laughed as Taka turned around to face him. “You look like you’re about to kill someone. Out of clothes or something?”

He stood there, frozen, staring vacantly at Akira. Then he suddenly blinked and flustered, “S-sorry, I just, got kind of caught up in my thoughts.” He coughed, “Yeah, a lot of my clothes are too hot right now. And…I just wanted a new bag.” His eyes fell to the ground and he suddenly held Akira’s hand gently.

Akira’s cheeks flared. _Wait wait wait wait–_

Taka dropped his hand, held his head high again and smiled, “Race you to the CD shop!” He spun around on his heel and began to run.

“What the–? Oi! Taka! We’re in the middle of a shopping centre!!” He sprinted after him.

 _What was that what was that what was that?!_ His thoughts raced as fast as he ran. _First he ignores me and when I catch his attention he looks at the ground with a sullen face like his heart was just broken, then he holds my fucking hand, and then he just turns around and runs away?! What is this?!_

But his smile sent sparks flying through his chest, and that was all that was making his feet move in that moment. _Chase him,_ he heard a voice say in his head. But he wondered, why? _He’s all you need right now._

They began to approach the CD shop from across the shopping centre. Only a few people were around, and Akira sped up. With his footsteps heavily echoing through the air he swung his arm around Taka’s right side.

_You’re in love with Takayuki Matsumoto, don’t you know that?_

Another voice, a strangely familiar but distant voice, chimed in his mind.

 _Did you_ just _realise?_

His arm wrapped around Taka’s small shoulder and firmly pulled him towards him. And Taka let himself silently fall into Akira’s shoulder. With his shopping bags hanging from his closed palms he closed his eyes and breathed him in.

Akira grunted. “God, what’s wrong with you today? You’re acting weird.” He felt Taka’s forehead gently pressed onto his shoulder, standing still and calm. After a few seconds of silence Akira suddenly gasped and gently pushed Taka off of him, face red. “S-so, why the CD shop?”

For an instant Taka’s expression sunk again, but he immediately stood up straight and smiled. “The shop I’m looking for is right next to it.” He turned and extended his arm towards a large shop with an open mouth that screamed of a happy television host.

“You’re kidding me…” Akira slumped his shoulders and cocked the side of his mouth. He groaned, “Why did we have to run all the way here then!?”

Letting his arm fall back to his side, Taka’s dark eyes softened as he closed his mouth. His lips curved into a subtle but sweet smile. “Just because,” he said. “It’ll be the last shop, I promise.”

The two of them entered the shop together. It was a new shop, Akira recalled, he saw it that day the last time he went to the CD shop next door with Kouyou. And it was obvious too. The ceiling was higher in the air with bright white fluorescent lights gleaming onto the smooth tiles and white display shelves without a speck of dust on them. Taka quickly found a bag to his liking - a black sports bag with a thick but soft exterior and a spacious inside. So they left the store and the shopping centre together, only to step outside to a heavy downpour of summer rain.

Akira put up his umbrella and held it above his head. Examining it, he said, “There should be enough room for the two of us.” He smiled at Taka, “Want me to walk you home?”

Taka nodded and stepped underneath the umbrella. They were silent throughout the walk back to his house, with the exception of Taka giving Akira the directions in the maze of houses that was the district’s residential area. With electric poles and lines standing above them in the rainy sky, they finally reached Taka’s house.

“Phew, your house is pretty far from mine.” Akira sighed and chuckled. “I’m gonna head home now. See you at school on Tuesday.” As he began to turn around, he suddenly felt a hand grasp the sleeve of his shirt.

Akira turned around and saw Taka staring at him with wide eyes. “You’re not coming tomorrow?”

He blinked. “Uh, I have this test thing, for a heavy machinery permit license. So yeah, I’m not gonna bother coming to school,” he shrugged.

Suddenly a pained expression arose on Taka’s face. With a choking voice, he stuttered, “I…”

He spoke his words, and Akira stood under his umbrella completely frozen for the second time that day. But unlike that morning, he felt his heart practically shatter, and the broken pieces stabbed the insides of his chest like knives. His face paled in a second, and it was as though Taka’s words grabbed his throat and began to squeeze. He couldn’t breathe.

And then the next thing he knew, Taka stood onto his toes and pressed his lips into Akira’s. In the moment in his time that stood still, Taka slipped his hand behind Akira’s neck and absentmindedly played with his hair with his fingers. He gently pushed himself off of him and dropped back onto the soles of his feet before resting his head in Akira’s chest. After muttering another few words, he turned around and ran through the front door of his house.

Akira watched Taka close the door behind him, and suddenly his chest burst and he doubled over, gasping for air. And for the first time in minutes, he breathed.

_“I’m running away to Tokyo tomorrow night.”_


	8. Chapter 7

_“I’m running away to Tokyo tomorrow night. I…wanted to say goodbye to you tomorrow afternoon, but I guess this is it…”_

In the exam room wide with high school students frantically flipping pages and writing answers, Akira’s mind blanked completely.

_“Goodbye, Akira. All the best.”_

He frantically shook his head. No, Taka’s not going to leave. That was right, it must have been some kind of practical joke, it had to have been! Maybe, he would go home after his exam, and everyone would somehow be there to surprise him. No, that was stupid. Why would they do that? They were at school. And….and Kouyou was angry at him. What kind of miserable party would that be? There was no way.

Akira slammed his fist into his thigh. It didn’t matter! What mattered there and then was the test he was taking, he could figure out what was happening with Taka later.

But even as he read through the questions, and hastily wrote his answers on the paper, the thoughts of Taka and Kouyou and them leaving his life whirled around in his mind. His fingers began to shake.

* * *

The final school bell rang through the halls. Chatter clouded the classrooms and halls in an instant as students cluttered out of their chairs and desks to grab their bags and leave the classroom. With his head down low, Kouyou filed his books into his bag and slid the zip across the top.

As he turned around to leave the classroom, Gondo and his broad shoulders were standing right in front of him. “Woah–!” Kouyou jumped back. “Gondo? Hey, I didn’t see you there.”

“Hey, Takashima.” Gondo cleared his throat nervously. “Have you seen Matsumoto today?” After Kouyou shook his head, he sighed, “Right, I thought so…Takashima, I’m worried about him, is that weird?”

“What? No!” Kouyou frowned, “Did something happen?”

Gondo stared out the window past Kouyou’s shoulder. “Last time I talked to him was after the band rehearsal last week. And, just out of nowhere he told me he’s thinking of running away to Tokyo. At first I thought he was just having a bad week, and felt like he wanted to run away, so I laughed it off. But when I did, he walked off and hasn’t said a word to me since.” His voice began to speed up, “I didn’t believe him but now he’s not here today and he’s not picking up his phone and–”

Kouyou dropped his bag on his desk and grabbed Gondo by the shoulders. “Matsumoto will be fine.” Underneath his large hands, he felt Gondo’s shoulders begin to relax. “I’ll…I’ll ask Akira, he’ll probably know where he is,” as though trying to reassure himself as well, Kouyou nodded his head and let go of Gondo’s shoulders.

“You’ve…talked to him, right? About everything you told me?”

His face fell. “No, but,” he gulped, “that doesn’t matter right now.” Kouyou picked his bag off the desk again, “I’ll call Akira, don’t worry. I’ll let you know what he tells me.” As he stepped past him, he pat a reassuring hand on Gondo’s shoulder before walking out of the classroom.

* * *

The papers were pinned to the board with the edges parallel to the ceiling and floor line. Frantic heads bobbed around in the crowd, desperately trying to find their names on the giant sheets of paper, and Akira himself hustled through bodies in white buttoned up shirts. He shifted further and further to the right side, then ran back around the crowd to the left to read the hundreds of names again, with his throat and chest tightening more and more until his hands and legs began to shake and everything in his body screamed to run back and read it all again.

But he never found his name.

With his head down and shoulders slumped, Akira left the building.

He dragged his feet down the small, concrete stairs onto the road where he saw people step in front of him. Some pairs of shoes bounded off the ground with energy, and others, like his, dragged the lifeless feet and dying motivations across the road.

Kouyou hated him, Taka was leaving, he failed the machinery test, no second chances - it all weighed his small shoulders down like the bleak, cloudy sky above him.

His phone began to ring in his hand. He flipped the cellphone open and begrudgingly pressed his thumb against the green button to the side and held it up to his ear. His voice choked, “Hello?”

“Akira, you’re there! Thank god!” Kouyou’s voice rang through the speaker next to his ear. “Listen, Gondo came up to me and–”

Akira grabbed the collar of his own shirt. Without him knowing, tears began to spill from his eyes. “Kouyou, I don’t know what to do…” The lump in his throat squeezed at him. “I bombed out on the exam this morning, I basically have no future, Taka’s going to Tokyo, what do I do, Kouyou?!” He cried, “Everything’s falling apart!! What’s going to happen to me now?!”

On the other side of the line Kouyou fell silent. He heard his voice croak, “Akira…you want to see Matsumoto, right? We’re looking for him right now. Where are you?”

His voice shook, “…I’m going to the train station.” Akira dropped his hand to his side and ignored Kouyou’s panicked voice before hanging up.

A single bound off the ground later and Akira was sprinting, out the gates of the building into the town. The surrounding buildings flew past him in the afternoon sky as he ran towards the shopping centre in the middle of the town before darting left.

Only a little more than 24 hours before Taka was next to him, underneath his small umbrella in the rain, almost snuggled against his arm. He wanted to punch the past him in the face for taking advantage of those moments, not even considering for a second that things could change with a single confession, a kiss, and 24 hours.

Just in front of the maze that led to the residential area, Akira stopped and caught his breath. In front of him, walking through the stone fences, he saw his stupid self and Taka walking together under an umbrella. “Fuck!!” he screamed before running away from the image in front of him. He began to approach the small set of stairs across the road leading down to the small train station. He ran down the stairs, bolted through the entrance to the only platform there was and froze at the top of the next set of stairs.

Standing in the middle of the platform was a short boy with nothing but his mp3 player and black sports bag on his shoulder.

And as though all his emotions hurled themselves out of his throat, Akira screamed Taka’s name.

Taka’s shoulders raised as he spun around, eyes widened while Akira rushed down the stairs towards him.

Then finally, with his feet stumbling and almost tripping over each other, Akira reached him.

Taka stood in front of Akira and craned his neck to look up at him with stunned eyes. “Suzuki…” He held his breath. “Why are you here?”

Why was he there? Akira remained silent, heaving his chest up and down and trying not to collapse on his shaking legs. Did he go to say goodbye? Did he go to try to convince him to stay? No no no no, neither of those choices felt right in Akira’s heart. But else was there to say?! “Taka, don’t go.”

Taka’s eyes darted from the train tracks and the tunnel to Akira’s desperately pleading face. He shook his head, “I’m sorry, there’s no stopping me now. I’ve already run away from home, I can’t go back.”

“Then…” Akira panted. His head spun with emotions he couldn’t put into words. But the vortex suddenly cleared in an instant when Akira blurted, “Then take me with you!”

Taka stared at him, unblinking. Ringing through the subway walls as a female voice on the intercom. His breath began to speed up. “No, Suzuki, I can’t. There’s nothing for you there, I can’t let you risk it–”

“Like there’s something for me here?!” Akira burst. “With everything that’s been happening recently…” his voice shook, “I can’t stay in school, I failed the heavy machinery test this morning, there’s no way I’m going to have a future here! And Kouyou hates me, everyone hates me anyway, and you’re leaving! I want to run away, I want to disappear! So take me with you, Taka, please!”

“Don’t be stupid,” Taka’s voice shook. “You have a home, you have the band, and Kouyou, waiting for you to come back. If I stay it’ll only cause trouble for the rest of you, so I might as well just go. I have plenty of connections there, I’ll be fine.”

“But…Gondo was looking for you–”

“I don’t care about Gondo!”

“Then I don’t care about Kouyou!”

Taka balled his hands into fists, “Stop it!! You can’t just leave your best friend without saying anything!”

“Is that not what you’re doing right now?!”

“But I don’t matter to you nor Gondo–”

“Bullshit!”

“Why do you care about me so much?!”

“Because I l–!!”

The high pitched siren pierced the station just as Akira screamed, and the train began to zoom past them just as he stopped.

Unstoppable tears poured from Akira’s eyes. “Please, you’re all I have left…”

Taka’s fingers began to loosen their grip around the sports bag. “Akira…”

Train doors opened.

“Takashima…!”

Akira spun around and saw Kouyou standing at the base of the stairs with his arms hanging by his sides, staring. “Kouyou–”

Bells rung through the speakers around the platform as the train began to move. Akira turned around again and saw the space in front of him completely empty, and behind the glass on the carriage door was Taka with his back to him, running further and further through the train carriage away from him. The moment flashed past, and the next thing he knew the train was gone, and Taka too.

Behind him, Kouyou’s voice was almost silent but incredibly shaky. “Akira…do you really…” He turned around to see Kouyou crying and hiccuping at the bottom of the stairs. “Why…?”

Akira breathed into his chest and balled his hand into a fist. “Kouyou…I’m going to Tokyo tomorrow.”

Kouyou’s teeth clenched tight as he stormed down the stairs, raised his fist and swung it straight into Akira’s face. The boy fell limp onto the ground, and Kouyou dropped to his knees and grabbed his shirt collar with both hands and screamed, “Are you insane?! Why!? Why do you want to go to Tokyo?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is for guys like us?! No money, no reputable skills, no stable roof over our heads!? You’re a fucking nutcase!!”

“Then…Taka’s in danger…” Akira’s neck hung back limply. “I have to go…or he’ll…”

“Don’t screw with me,” Kouyou seethed, “That’s not what you were thinking when you were trying to convince him to let you go with him…” His hands began to shake, “I know you, Akira. And sometimes, you can be the a selfish pain in the ass and all it takes for you to become that and throw away everything is just some guy to walk into your life and catch your eye for a second!”

“The fuck do you know?!” Akira grabbed Uruha’s shoulder, flipped himself over and slammed Kouyou’s back into the cold ground. “Stop pretending you know everything! You don’t know anything about me or Taka!”

A bitter laugh escaped Kouyou’s throat. “Then tell me, Akira, what do you love about Matsumoto?” He tangled more of Akira’s shirt in his fingers still holding onto his collar. “You know, if you really cared about his well being, you would’ve tried to convince him to stay.” His voice darkened, “But no, it’s all about _you_. You’d rather run away with him into danger because you think it’s scarier here, when in actuality it’s the safest place for _both_ of you.” He growled, “But I guess that thought didn’t get through your stupid, thick skull!”

Akira froze. He stared at Kouyou’s face burning red with anger. “That’s not…” His eyes were dry and swollen from crying so much there weren’t any more tears left. So he watched Kouyou breathe beneath him in a daze. “None of that matters, we need to go get Taka–”

Two arms suddenly snatched Akira and pulled him towards a large man in a dark blue uniform, with a booming voice shouting in his ear. The man dragged him to his feet and across the platform for a few steps before another two took Kouyou by the arms and did the same.

As Akira was dragged away slowly from the train tracks panic began to take over him again. “Kouyou, you idiot! You let Taka go! This is all your fault!!”

Kouyou couldn’t do anything else other than scream curses at Akira struggling against the large security guards pulling him up the stairs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here it is, the chapter that contains the scene that was half the reason i started this whole series in the first place: angsty best friend fights :))))


	9. Chapter 8

Akira was all alone the day after that.

“Yes, I am calling to report an incident involving two of your students.” The security guard looked up from their desk towards the two boys sitting across from them in the stuffy white-walled office. Two pairs of dark brown eyes were glued to the ground and heads hung from slumped shoulders.

“They were brawling in the middle of one of our subway platforms,” they said. “There weren’t many around, but it is still an act of public disturbance. One of them also assaulted the other.” The guard’s brows relaxed, “I hope they reflect upon their actions too. Good day.” With a loud clatter the handset was dropped onto the speaker. The guard leaned back into their seat. “Whichever one of you is Takashima, you’ve been suspended from school for a week.”

When he went home, his left cheek was swelling just a little more than the right one.

Cars sped by in the humid afternoon as the boys stood apart on separate sides of the path leading to the crossing. Little by little, Akira glanced to his side. With each look he saw Kouyou stiffly hung over his feet, and every time his heart ached more. But his eyes were far too dry to cry anymore tears.

Akira slowly turned his head towards Kouyou again, but suddenly the taller boy’s eyesight snapped in his direction. _“What?”_

“I…” He stared down at his shoes powdered light grey with gravel. “Kouyou, I’m sorry. It wasn’t supposed to be like this…”

Kouyou clicked his tongue and turned his head away. “’Sorry’ doesn’t mean jack shit to me anymore.” The light turned green across the street. Kouyou shoved his bruised hands into his pockets and began to cross the long road without a single head turn back.

The dying orange light of the sun crept into Akira’s room as the door softly closed behind him. His bag dropped onto the floor with a thud. With his breath held in his chest, Akira stepped towards his desk next to the window. To his right was a jagged pile of closed notebooks and notebooks, and the rest of his books lined up on the wall. His hand began to hover over the stack on his desk.

_You have a home, you have the band, and Kouyou, waiting for you to come back._

You’re wrong, Taka!!

Akira’s vision began to blur once again. Tightly shutting his stinging eyes, his voice burst from his chest in cries. Like a strike of lightning his hand crashed into the pile and sent his books spinning to the floor. He crossed his other hand and grabbed the back of his chair. Another scream, and another fling of his arm it flew towards the other side of his room. His chest heaved as he turned to his left, and in the corner of his room was a bass guitar sitting upright on its stand.

_But I think you’re the best bassist in our school. I mean, you look pretty cool when you play, and I know you love bass a lot. Why don’t you ask him yourself?_

That was his chance. Although Taka had been the one to initiate it first, it was what Akira wanted - that first step, that connection. Yet, all that came out of it were a few shallow conversations and a childhood friendship shattered, but to him it all made sense because it was all for the sake of him! It was all…it was all–!

_Then tell me, Akira, what do you love about Matsumoto?_

–his own damn fault.

Open and closed books, pencils and rubbers and rulers and loose paper sprawled the floors of Akira’s bedroom. Darkness and shadow left behind by the dead afternoon sun surrounded his seated figure against the desk. Without tearing his eyes away from the mess that was front of him, he slowly pulled the thin blanket from his bed and wrapped it around himself.

Ah…How did he fail to notice it before? Kouyou was right, he did have a thick, dense skull. He couldn’t control himself, or even understand himself. Why did he love Taka in the first place? How could he become so blinded by a love he couldn’t even comprehend that he sacrificed everything and everyone else around him for a single chance? Did he really want to go with Taka to Tokyo when it really was safer for both of them to go home? But then why was Kouyou more concerned with Akira who might have left, rather than Taka who already left and was in even more danger?

He pulled the blanket closer around him by the sheets between his thumbs.

* * *

“I guess you’ll be coming back to school in two days, huh?” Gondo placed a small notebook on top of the table in the centre of Kouyou’s bedroom. “Time passes by pretty quick.”

“Not when you’re stuck at home doing absolutely nothing,” Kouyou scoffed and rest his chin in his hand. “If I was caught playing video games all day my parents would get even angrier at me.”

Gondo didn’t respond, and Kouyou looked at him. His eyes were downcast and his eyebrows were furrowed close together in thought.

He frowned, “What is it, Gondo?”

The other boy remained unresponsive. Suddenly he reached into his bag and pulled out his cellphone. “I have voice mails from Matsumoto.” He flipped the cover open. “He’s been sending them everyday. I want you to listen to them.”

Kouyou watched as Gondo began to play the voice mails. The sound of passing cars spilled from the speakers until Taka’s quiet but deep voice began to speak. He sounded nervous, hesitant, as he relayed the events of the day and whose place he was crashing and which jobs and bands he went searching for.

 _“Hey, Gondo. It’s been a while, I think. If you’re still mad at me just…feel free to delete these.”_ He took a deep breath. _“I’m going to go around the city tomorrow and find anyone I know. Until I do, I’m staying in a manga cafe in Shibuya. I have enough money to last me food for about a week, if you call instant noodles proper meals. I’ll also have to go job hunting tomorrow. Don’t worry though, I brought some resumes with me. If I have time I’ll…try to find some bands to join too. Well, that’s it for today, see ya.”_

In the second and third recordings, his voice was even smaller. In the fourth, he cried.

 _“I’m such a fuck-up,”_ he said, and there was a thump on a nearby glass. _“Gondo, I don’t even know why I’m sending these to you. I’m so sorry. I didn’t talk to you properly and now I have the audacity to hope you’re listening. I never should’ve told Akira I was leaving. I should’ve known…I should’ve known he would come after me…”_ His voice began to choke. _“I ruined everything. I ruined Akira and I ruined his relationship with Takashima. How could I just…fuck–!” It broke off._

Gondo played the fifth and final voice mail.

 _“Please, Gondo, I have one more favour and I’ll never ask for anything from you again. Tell Akira and Takashima I’m sorry…”_ He fell silent for a few seconds. _“I’ll be in the Shinjuku area at a friend from middle school’s place from today. At least, while his parents are out on their trip.” The headset was placed onto the telephone, and the mail ended._

Koyou’s voice lowered. “Why are you making me listen to this?”

“I…” Gondo hesitated. “I want you to forgive Matsumoto.”

“Don’t be stupid, none of this is his fault. It’s…” he suddenly stopped. “It’s mine…” His voice began to shake. “If I hadn’t run away from Akira all those times, maybe he would’ve managed to tell Matsumoto to stay instead of trying to run away with him. Oh god, I made him think I hated him.” His lips quivered. “I could never hate Akira. And if I stayed with him, then maybe, Matsumoto would’ve had another reason to stay, but I was selfish.”

As Kouyou shrunk and curled into a ball in his shoulders and skinny arms, Gondo began to speak. “I made Suzuki listen to these as well. He said the same thing.”

Kouyou tangled his fingers into his hair. “What do you mean?”

“That it wasn’t Matsumoto’s fault, or even yours, but his, and that he was selfish. He said if he wasn’t so obsessed with Matsumoto he would’ve noticed him and his feelings better, as well as yours, and Matsumoto would still be here. Do you see this connection now? But this whole situation can be seen in two ways: that it’s no one’s fault, or that it’s everyone’s fault. Either way, you can’t stay away from each other forever like this. So…I brought him here with me.”

“You… _what?_ ”

Gondo quietly stood up and picked up his bag. “See you on Monday,” he said before leaving the room. As he turned left down the small hallway, Akira slowly peeked his head through the doorway.

Akira swallowed. “Hey, Kouyou.” As his best friend continued to stare at him in disbelief, he stepped into the room. “May I sit?”

Kouyou dropped his chin, but Akira wasn’t sure if it was a nod or a rejection. He cautiously lowered his knees to the floor before dropping onto his bottom.

The silence was heavy, thick, and it pulled at the air between them before twisting it like a tense rag.

Kouyou broke the ice first. “So, you heard everything me and Gondo were just talking about, right? And he made you listened to all of Matsumoto’s messages too.” He looked up, and across the table was Akira’s gaze focusing into his eyes.

“I…” Akira sunk into his body. “I was so stupid…I could tell you weren’t happy about the fact I had basically…forgotten about you, yet I didn’t talk to you about it.” His voice shook, “I should’ve said something. And, I didn’t mean it when I said everything was your fault! I can’t believe I said something like that. Kouyou, I’m sorr–”

“If you’re only here to make more excuses, just go home,” said Kouyou. “Gondo already told me, didn’t you hear? Besides, I’m not the victim here. I’m not the one who ran away from home to a dangerous city like Tokyo and is surviving there on luck and whim. So, you can just stop worrying about me now.”

Something gave Akira a strange feeling of deja vu. Suddenly, he reached his arm across the table and flicked the nail of his right middle finger dead into Kouyou’s forehead.

He yelped, “Ow, what the hell, Akira?!”

“Don’t tell me not to worry about you when you’re obviously upset about all our actions. I can’t just ignore you! I know you’re an idiot, Kouyou, but not like this.”

The image of a diner appeared in Kouyou’s mind - the image of Akira facing him in a booth, holding his nose and scrunching his face in pain. _I know you’re an idiot, Akira, but not like this,_ he had said.

“Also, that totally wasn’t for punching me square in the face or anything,” Akira huffed. “But you’re right, we should be more concerned about Taka’s safety. We might not be able to bring him back, but those voicemails aren’t really proving anything to me. I at least want to be sure that he’s doing okay.”

Kouyou shot a glance at his calendar, then looked back to Akira. “We should go tomorrow, since he’s in Shinjuku anyway. Let’s meet at the station at 8am.”

Akira nodded. “Well, now that that’s been settled, I’m gonna head home.” He stood up and a small, relieved laugh escaped from his chest, “Man, this week has been really tense…”

“I’ll walk you out,” Kouyou said as he followed Akira out the door. Together they went down the stairs and reached the entrance where Akira put on his shoes.

As he turned the doorknob and sunlight spilled into the house, Kouyou spoke, “Akira, I’m sorry for calling you stupid back there.” He watched Akira look at him over his shoulder.

“Hey, we’re still best friends, right?”

Kouyou smiled. “Of course.”

The corners of Akira’s lips upturned into a smile of his own, as bright as the sun behind him, and Kouyou could have sworn that he saw the tiniest beads of tears in his eyes. Suddenly Akira pivoted on his foot and wrapped his arms around Kouyou, pulling him into a tight hug. “Thank you, Kouyou,” he said.

Kouyou sighed and patted Akira’s back softly. “I should be the one thanking _you._ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi everyone! thank you for patiently waiting for the new chapter of this series >_


	10. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh gosh, it’s been six whole months since the last chapter was released. I’m really sorry. I don’t have many reasons why this took so long other than life, pretty much, and writing other things. But the most important thing I want to say is that I promise I did not half-ass this just for the sake of finishing it, and this chapter was always going to be the last one. Again, I’m sorry it took so long, but I also want to say thank you so much for joining me on this adventure that was the Sparks Fly series.

“Akira, hurry up! We’re gonna miss the bullet train!”

Kouyou and Akira bolted down the stairs into the wide platform. A voice rung from the speakers above their heads over the sound of the train doors closing.

“Can’t a train just be _one_ minute late once a century?!” Akira jumped onto the platform with Kouyou behind him and they both fell to the floor. The train began to move and they sighed with relief.

Kouyou stood up first, leaning back onto the wall as he stood up. “Come on,” he said as he reached his hand towards Akira. “You won’t fall off this time.”

“ _This_ time?” Akira snorted. “You weren’t even there when I did fall off the bullet train.” He took his hand and let Kouyou pull him to his feet.

They wandered into the carriage, down the aisle between heads in seats until they reached the back corner. For the first few minutes they sat in silence with hypothetical questions and answers buried into their chests, yet it was calm and understanding.

“Hey, I think we both know I never got to ask this, but…” Kouyou swallowed. “What is it exactly you love about Matsumoto?”

Akira leaned back into his seat. “Sometimes,” he said, “You can’t really tell why you love someone - you just do. But if I think about it, I felt like…I really shared a connection with Taka. It hasn’t gone very far yet, but we just ‘clicked’, and I felt like we could be together. But if I really had to give a more solid answer…I guess…

“He makes me happy.”

Morning sunlight poured through the window and shone a glow onto the skin on their faces. It hurt a little to look out to the buildings rushing past them, but Kouyou let it burn in the corner of his eye as he listened to Akira and watched a little smile on his lips.

“But, I still can’t know for sure until I see him again.”

Kouyou stared. “That’s some insightful stuff you’ve said just now.”

He snapped towards him, shocked. “What, am I not smart enough to say good things?!”

From that point onwards the train ride to Tokyo fell into easy conversation.

* * *

The streets of Tokyo bustled with cars, bikes and people that weaved in all different directions like seas of fish. But air was heavy and humid on the skins of their necks, and Akira pulled the hem of Kouyou’s shirt as he marched into the heart of Shinjuku.

“Akira, I’m not a child, you know,” Kouyou sighed. “So, where do you think Matsumoto would be? We can’t just search aimlessly or we’ll never find him. Unless of course we’re actually in a shoujo manga and we’ll see him on the other side of a crossing.”

“Wait! Shut up! I think I see him!”

At the front of the crowd on the other side of the long street, a shorter boy carried a black sports bag on his shoulder. He stared at his shoes and stuffed his hands into his pockets.

The world around Akira immediately began to fade. The sky, the towering buildings and the people all around him seemed to disappear as his eyes fixated on the boy across the street.

“Akira, what are you spacing out for? Let’s go.”

Akira grabbed Kouyou’s wrist. “Taka!”

“What?”

“Across the street!”

“What are you…” Kouyou looked over and began to scan the other side of the crossing. His eyes widened, “Holy shit! Viva la shoujo manga plot convenience!”

Akira bolted into the crossing before he even realised Kouyou had said anything. But it didn’t matter. All that mattered were the soles of his shoes that pounded across the road and Taka on the other side. He drew in a breath, and released everything into one scream of his name.

The familiar sound slammed against his heart, and he swore for a moment that time had turned back, that they were still at the train station in the next town over, on the line between day and night.

Taka immediately raised his head - wide, broken eyes peeked behind the dark fringe of his hair - and couldn’t even gape his mouth open before Akira tightly wrapped his arms around him.

Kouyou caught up to them in the middle of the crossing, just as the other pedestrians began to weave around them. But before any thought could enter his mind, a numbing in his chest told him to step back, and just watch.

He could just hear Akira’s voice murmuring into Taka’s shoulder, and an instant later the smaller boy stood on his toes and pulled him closer, a hand softly sifting through Akira’s hair. The shock in Taka’s eyes slowly melted away until there was nothing but content and calm left in him. He whispered something in Akira’s ear and smiled.

Kouyou felt his chest swell. He knew in that moment that everything was going to be okay.

An ugly car horn suddenly blasted the moment away. The three boys jumped away from each other, slowly turning to the line of drivers glaring at them. They pulled  half-apologetic faces as they ran through the rest of the crossing. Laughter filled their hearts as they tripped over the pavement to the entrance of a mall.

Taka pushes himself off the wall of the building. “Hugging smack dab in the middle of a giant crossing?! We’re not characters from a movie!”

“Yeah, because the fact we found you a minute after arriving in a city we’ve never been to is enough proof that we’re actually in a shoujo manga,” Kouyou snorted. “Also, it’s not like you tried to get off the road or anything.”

Taka’s jaw dropped. “You’ve never been here?” He turned to Akira next to him, “Not even once?”

“I guess there’s a first for everything,” he shrugged.

Suddenly he brightened and stood just a little taller than before. “Can I show you guys around? It’ll be a waste if you came all the way here and didn’t even get to hang out.”

Akira looked at Kouyou. “We’ll go home before dinner?”

He nodded. “Yeah, before dinner.”

Taka beamed as he spun around on his heel. “Well, I hope you’re ready, because you’re about to get the worst tour ever! No trains, no buses, we go everywhere by foot!”

“Oh, crap.” Akira turned to Kouyou. “I _told_ you not to wear Dad sandals today!”

“Screw you! I’ll have you know these shoes are _very_ comfortable!”

The streets were sweltering under the thick heat of rainy days gone by. Droplets of sweat slipped down the curve of their backs as they ran across the streets and in and out of freezing malls in the concrete jungle that was Tokyo. The day was clear, and with every turn they took the world spun around them so fast they could feel the sky on their faces. Every car, every neon sign caught their eyes. The city was alive.

By the time late-afternoon rolled around, Taka had taken them to Harajuku. For the first time they were quiet, sitting at a small circular table in front of an ice-cream shop with their ankles tangled together underneath.

Akira thought it was a little strange, the three of them had never been so physically close before, but the warmth felt familiar, like something they always had. He always had Kouyou and his long legs he could never get used to, and then the sparks of fire in his chest that pulled him closer to Taka. He looked up towards Kouyou sitting across from him, “Hey, Ko…”

His voice barely came out a choke before he saw Kouyou’s head was turned to the side as he stared out elsewhere. His dark eyes were glimmering like stars in the night sky, full of curiosity and admiration.

Akira turned in the same direction, and that was when he spotted it. There was a group of boys, only a little older than they were, standing together in torn black shirts and chains hanging from jeans with guitar bags hanging from their shoulders. _They’re so cool,_ he thought, and his heart swelled. He could only imagine that he began to look just like Kouyou - like a wishful child finding what they wanted to do for the first time.

He looked glanced at him through the corner of his eye, and saw him staring down at his hands. He blinked, and looked back at Kouyou across from him. He opened his mouth, but before his voice could come, he froze.

“Hey, I’m sorry if this is weird, but…”

Akira and Kouyou were snapped out of their thoughts, and they both turned to Taka. Crap, was it really that obvious? They couldn’t help but be a little embarrassed. “Sorry, were we being weird?”

Taka furrowed his eyebrows, “Uh, that’s not what I was…But, anyway?” he coughed into the back of his hand nervously, pressing his knuckles gently against his cheek. “I was just saying that I’m…happy you guys came to see me. Thank you, and again, I’m…sorry.”

The two boys looked at each other, then back to Taka. Kouyou blinked. “What do you…”

“…I pulled you into my band, then about a week or two later I left the city without the decency to let you know, and I almost destroyed your friendship on the way. You didn’t deserve that, yet you even came all the way here just to check on me after everything I’ve done to you…I’m sorry.”

Akira looked at Kouyou again, who had averted his gaze away from both of them. “I don’t…” He gulped, and slowly turned back to Taka. “You don’t have to worry about us, we’re all good now. Besides, you should be focusing on yourself.” He couldn’t help but remember the voice mails, the sound of his voice breaking over the phone, under all his pressures. “So…”

“Hey, Akira.”

A large hand appeared in front of him, and Kouyou dropped a bunch of coins into his hand. “Remember that ice cream you owe me?”

Akira closed his hand. He nodded. “Yeah, I’ll go get it now. Chocolate chip?”

Kouyou smiled at him weakly as Akira stood up from the table. The bell on the front door jingled behind Akira after he went inside.

“Have you found a job yet?”

Taka looked up, surprise painted across his face. “Um, yes, surprisingly. At Denny’s.”

“A place to live?”

“…A friend’s.”

Kouyou silenced, still not looking at him.

“Takashima…”

“I’m not mad at you, if that’s what you’re concerned about.”

“…Not even for taking him?”

A soulless, almost bitter laugh escaped Kouyou’s throat. “You didn’t take him. Akira’s just an idiot. It’s not your fault he was so head-over-heels he forgot about me.”

Taka sat back in his chair. “But I still…”

“He knows better now, and so do I. I was…being an asshole about it, about the third-wheeling.” Kouyou pulled his hands off the table and watched them fall into his lap. “I…we could’ve been good friends, and maybe you would’ve stayed home, then.” He sighed, “The point is that I don’t…I don’t hate you, at all. And if that’s not convincing enough, well, I was really worried about you. So was Akira, and Gondo.”

Taka nodded slowly.

“And…” Kouyou continued, “If it gets tough, call us. We’ll come running to you. And we’ll help you out if you decide to come back.”

The smaller boy chuckles. “I don’t think I can see that happening - going back home…”

Silence falls between them. It was less tense than before, their feelings now hung in the air.

“One last thing, Matsumoto…”

Taka watched as Kouyou finally raised his head to stare him in the eyes.

“What do you love about Akira?”

* * *

Warm orange light spilled through the small window of the bullet train, blanketing the boys’ tired legs as they sat next to each other on the way home. They leaned close together, their shoulders and heads knocking gently together with each turn of the train.

“Tokyo is pretty amazing, huh?” Akira sighed. “We ran around literally all day, and never even got through all of the Shibuya ward.”

“Yeah, it’s massive. I bet there are heaps of cool people too, playing good music too.”

He snorted. “You mean those guys you were staring at?”

“Don’t say that like you weren’t staring too.”

Akira stared out the window, watching as the tall buildings slowly disappeared from his sight. “Hey, Kouyou…”

“Hmm?”

“Do you think we could go back again after we graduate? Not to sight-see, but to…”

Kouyou knew. “Yeah. Yeah, I would. Forever.”

“…Cool, me too.”

“So…did you get to know what you wanted?”

Akira made a small, affirming noise.

“And…?”

“….I know that I still don’t know enough to make a conclusion.” Akira closed his eyes as he leaned his head on Kouyou’s shoulder. “It’s…I realised after all this that it’s not supposed to be easy - the whole loving someone thing. It’s not only about liking to talk to him, or wanting to be his. There’s more I don’t understand, but they’re things I have to know before I can really say for sure.”

Kouyou nodded sagely. “I see.”

“And what did you talk to Taka about while I finally got you that ice cream?”

“Hmm…I asked him what you loves about you.”

Surprisingly, he didn’t even stir. “What did he say?”

“He said you make sparks in him fly.”

Akira snorted. “That’s so cheesy.”

“Maybe, but maybe that also means you don’t need all those answers to complicated questions.”

“…I just love him, you know?”

“Yes. Yes, I do know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I say this story has been an adventure not only because I first published it on Tumblr over a year ago, but also because I was rereading the whole thing while writing this chapter aND MY GOD I CRINGED. My writing has changed so much, and I laughed at the prose and the dialogue of the first chapters but I love this story and I'm happy I finished it. Again, thank you all so much for reading!! <3 Love u all


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